Attention Nonvegetarian Restauranteurs

2 rules, ok?

1. NO HIDDEN MEAT. Yes, I'm using all caps to YELL.

If you're selling a dish that contains meat, say so. Is that so hard?

And btw.....why does everything have to contain meat? I recently went to a party where every single dish contained meat, including dessert! And I recently went to a Mexican restaurant that didn't offer even one meat-free option! What the heck is going on?

Mexican cuisine has many meat-free dishes. You could have bothered to offer one. They say 10% of the population is vegetarian--you're ostracizing a good number of potential customers.

2. VEGETARIANS ARE HUMAN BEINGS AND HENCE NEED PROTEIN.

I don't understand how you can call yourselves chefs, cooks, even restauranteurs if you can't figure out how to make a vegetarian dish.

Here are some clues:

a. Making one of your meat-based dishes and removing the meat doesn't mean it's a balanced meal worthy of us giving you return business.

b. Replacing the meat with a half-pound of cheese doesn't cut it either.

c. Think beans. Think ethnic dishes. It's not too hard, folks.